abracadabra

originally sent 8/18/05

Dear Mr. President,

Tonight I had dinner with an old friend. He is an ardent supporter of yours and it is a topic we generally agree not to discuss. Inevitably though one of us brings it up and we debate not only you, but also your decision to go to war in Iraq. (Here's a side note: Is the correct phrase "go to war IN Iraq" or is it "go to war WITH Iraq"? Why are we at war WITH Iraq now?)

Tonight's debate about you lead me to ask: "Why do you like him?" Apparently, you have something called "cohones" and know how to use them, primarily because of your background as a cowboy. My attempts to point out your Harvard and Yale frat background, coupled with your multi-millions while growing up, were dismissed. As I have mentioned before: Nice trick.

I believe the analogy that was used to describe your involvement in Iraq was a bar fight. "If someone hits me in a bar with a bat, I'm going to go back there and kick his ass." When I tried to use his analogy to accurately reflect the situation, I was told I do not understand at all what is going on. Here was my rebuttal: "If I get hit in the head with a bat (in a bar), I will go back and kick the guy's ass that hit me. I will not go back into the bar and turn to the guy's smaller, easier to hit friend, and proceed to kick his ass only because the guy who hit me isn't around anymore."

Apparently, according to my friend's argument, when the terrorists hit the World Trade Center, they were lead by Iraq. I did not know this. I was under the impression that Osama Bin Laden and the Al Qaeda terrorist network were responsible for the attacks. It was also my understanding that a lot of the terrorist cells that we suspected were involved were located in Afghanistan (which, in all fairness, we did bomb). I'm still not entirely certain of Saddam Hussein's World Trade Center connection. I know Saddam is a very bad leader and did nasty things to his people. I know that the world is probably better off without him as the leader in Iraq. I don't know why it is our business to attack him in the name of the World Trade Center attacks, just so we can rid ourselves of him as a threat. I also don't know if Osama Bin Laden and the Al Qaeda terrorist network (which by now is sounding like a local cable channel) have been caught and put to trial. Do we know for sure that none of the detainees in Guantanamo are Osama Bin Laden? I mean, really, what progress have we made here? Didn't Britain catch their terrorists within a week or so?

Well, whatever the story you choose to tell about that, I'm sure it will be a good one. You seem to have a gift of illusion (aka deception). Did you take lessons from Copperfield? Instead of making things disappear (although that does raise the question about Vice President Cheney's whereabouts) you make non-things appear. I'm sure your methods are a well-guarded trade secret; but someday, I would like to know how you did it.

Perplexedly,

LTV